People think that relationships are only couples, but relationships extend way beyond that, and therefore are immensely complicated and we don’t even realise it. Relationships are a very big part of our daily lives. We juggle so many different relationships in a day and it can be taxing to the body and the mind because each relationship is different and require different things from us.

Let me explain…

Family relationships

This is the most common but also the most complex and stressful in most cases. First of all, let’s define family. Family is you, your spouse and your children. For example, Jane is married to Tom and has 2 children named Paul and Lisa.

• Jane has a relationship with her husband Tom – husband/wife

• Jane has a relationship with her son Paul – mother/son

• Jane has a relationship with her daughter Lisa – mother/daughter

• AND Jane has a relationship with herself – her worries, her to-do, her life.

As you can see from this example, Jane has 4 relationships she needs to juggle just at home, and each one is different and requires different kinds of attention according to age, personality, familiarity (romantic) and other things. This can get overwhelming at times. Now add the relationships below and you can get a daily salad of stress that can overwhelm you very easily!

Relative relationships

Relatives are your extended family. That would be your siblings, parents, grandparents, cousins, aunts, uncles and of-course, you have to include your in-laws as-well. These will also differ according to the person and what kind of familiarity you have with each of these people.

Friend relationships or Friendships

There are varying degrees of friendship. You may find that you feel closer to some friends than others. This is perfectly normal. Some friends, especially if they have only been known for a short time or are not seen very often, may not be appropriate to confide in about personal issues or concerns. You may find that you feel more comfortable and able to confide in friends whom you have known for longer or spend more time with. Friends who are very close and know each other well are sometimes referred to as “best friends”.

Work relationships

These relationships are usually referred to as acquaintances and is commonly underestimated. When you are in a work situation, you must understand that you spend a minimum of 8 hours every single workday with these people. That is on average more time than what you spend with your family on a daily basis. Like any other relationship or friendship, these relationships will evolve and change over time because you spend a lot of time on them and with these people. Again, it will depend on the person, personality, familiarity and so forth.

Acquaintances

Acquaintances are intermittent relationships that you have with people that you don’t really know outside of that situation, although you might know them for a long time. Fir example, the copier guy that comes to fix the copier at work, or the gas station attendant that has been there for years, or the teller at the bank that has been working there for a long time, or your child’s teacher at school, etc. We tend to refer to these people as friends but in actual fact, they are acquaintances. It is not to say that these relationships will not evolve and change. Some do.

By understanding the different kinds of relationships, you can prioritise the important ones and just acquaint the rest.

Courtesy Angelina Lopez, Lopez Counselling Services, http://lopezcounselling.co.za